Dear Maura,
by breezie531
Summary: Maura finds a letter by her desk that Jane had dropped. It could change everything... but will it be for the better?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- Hey all. I wrote this a while ago and it was originally intended to be a one shot. BUT it will at least be a two shot now if not a full blown multi chapter fic. I totally forgot about it until Piazzolla Pie demanded I write more fics for her and I went through my fanfic folder to see what I might have started and not finished. SOOO here ya go I'll update this one when I can but I make no promises. **

Maura picked up the envelope that was on the floor next to her desk. _Maura_ was written in Jane's handwriting across the front.

"This must have been the envelope that Jane was talking about." Maura thought.

After a recent death scare on the job Angela had insisted that Jane be more careful but of course Jane had not followed her advice and instead chose to make sure she had some things in order just in case.

* * *

><p><em>The detective had walked down to the morgue to drop off some case files when the M.E. had noticed a stack of letters in her hand. <em>

_"That time of the month again Jane?" Maura had asked. _

_Jane had immediately gotten a scared look on her face looking down and behind her to check herself. "What no I didn't think so… wait are we talking about the same thing? What the hell are you talking about?"_

_Maura tilted her head "Bills Jane…what were you talking about?"_

_Jane had to laugh a little. "Nothing don't worry about it. Anyway no not bills just some letters I decided to write you know…just in case…"Jane ended in a serious tone._

_"Jane…Please don't talk like that…" Maura could feel tears forming in her eyes._

_Jane enveloped Maura in a hug. "Shhii-. I'm sorry. I never meant to make you cry." She rubbed comforting circles on the M.E's back trying to calm her down and when Maura had stopped sniffling Jane let her go pulling back and meeting the M.E's eyes. "Listen I gotta go take care of these letters but how 'bout dinner later on me?... Ya know to make up for my lack of sensitivity."_

_Maura sniffled and Jane wiped the tear from Maura's cheek with her thumb. Maura felt her breath catch. Jane smiled pulling back. "Ok I'll take that as a yes." Jane turned grabbing her envelopes and sauntering out of the morgue. "I'll see you at 6 my place… I'll cook. And yes before you ask ACTUAL food that doesn't come from a cardboard box." Maura nodded and went back to work._

* * *

><p>That had been a good two hours ago now and surely Jane had realized she was missing an envelope by now… right? Maura was extremely curious; she was the type of person who liked to know all the facts. She turned the envelope over and over in her hands trying to resist the urge to just open it. For once Maura Isles failed, curiosity got the best of her and she pulled the letter opener out of the top right drawer of her desk and opened the envelope she would find a way to explain it to Jane later.<p>

She unfolded the letter, her mind wandering to what information Jane would possibly want to share with her under such dreary and depressing conditions. She saw Jane's small surprisingly neat left handed handwriting on the paper.

_Dear Maura,  
>If you're reading this something has probably happened to me. I can almost guarantee that I wouldn't have the courage to tell you this face to face. You mean to much to me for me to risk our friendship. You scare me Maura. On the job I am a tough fearless cop, but with you… with you I am utterly and pathetically petrified. I've dreamt about telling you this a thousand times but I know I never could. You are destined for great things Maura Isles, a nice house, some kids and the person you love at your side. What I fear telling you is that more than anything I wish that person at your side was me. I wish that I could wake up next to you every morning for the rest of my life. I wish I could hold you when you cry, make you laugh and be the last person you say good night to before you go to sleep. I don't want a husband and a house with a white picket fence, because I want all that with you. Well I guess it would be I "wanted" now wouldn't it. I wish that I could have told you all this before Maura… I wish I had a backbone but I know I don't have enough of a backbone to tell you…ever. I couldn't take the rejection that I'm sure I would face if I ever told you this. I'm sorry if you read this and hate me Maura but I felt that I should tell you, that I needed to tell you. I love you Maura Isles, always.<em>

_Love,  
>Jane<em>

Maura wasn't sure why but she wanted to cry. How could Jane feel this way about her? How could she have missed this? Sure their friendship had always been a little closer than most but that was just how they were… wasn't it? Maura racked her brain… Why was did she feel excited like this…?

Maura pulled out her phone and texted Jane.

_Jane can we push dinner to 8 I need to go home and feed Bass and take a quick nap I'm not feeling so well.-Maura _

_Sure… are you sure you don't want to just cancel if you're not feeling well? I'll understand I promise.-Jane_

_No, but thank you Jane. I think 8 will be fine. See you then! :-)-Maura_

_Ok see ya then!-Jane_

* * *

><p>Maura put her phone back into her purse along with the letter. She just needed a little time to process these feelings.<p>

An hour later she had finished her paperwork grabbed her purse and coat and headed for her car. She headed home for a shower and some soul searching before heading to Jane's for her planned dinner.

Arriving home, Maura placed her bag by the doors kicking off her heels at the door and heading for the kitchen, it was a little early for wine but something told Maura that today warranted it.

Maura opened a fresh bottle of wine, and poured herself an extra large glass, she finished it before she even left the kitchen, poured herself another glass, and headed for her bedroom. Maura set her glass on bathroom sink. She stripped her clothes and climbing into her extra large luxurious shower.

As the water cascaded down her body, her mind wandered back to Jane. She had entertained thoughts about Jane in the past but just assumed that their close working relationship had caused lines to be blurred between friendship and something more, however now she couldn't help but wonder if it was something deeper.

Maura had thought that her need for Jane was just on the this side of the thin line between friendship and something more, however now she wasn't sure. As she washed her body she couldn't help but wonder what Jane's hands would feel like caressing her skin. Maura shook her head as if this would suddenly erase these new and slightly surprising thoughts.

She stepped out of the shower wrapping herself in a large towel and took a large gulp from her wine. She had a feeling tonight was going to be a long night. She dressed casually in a pair of designer jeans some ballerina flats and a silk button up shirt. _Jane might not be so fond of these buttons by the end of the night…_

The thought shocked Maura even more than the ones in her shower. She packed an overnight back just in case she spent the night at Jane's… _one way or another…_she thought. She finished her second glass of wine, and headed out to her kitchen to make sure that Bass had enough food and water to last him till tomorrow. When she saw exactly how much wine she had consumed she decided as much as she detested the unsanitary conditions of taxicabs it was her only safe option to get to Jane's and dialed the number of a cab company she quickly ordered a cab.

While waiting Maura finished yet another two larges glasses of wine polishing off the first bottle completely, the cab pulled up a few minutes later and honked impatiently. Maura grabbed her purse and overnight bag and headed for the cab. When she opened the door she saw the horrid conditions of the interior. The driver himself looked like a nice man, but had the distinct odor of week old anchovy pizza mixed with wet dog.

She closed the back door opening the front, she fumbled with her wallet for a $50 bill she handed it to the driver thanking him for coming all the way out and informing him that in fact she would not be needing his services. Maura walked back into her house dialing Jane's cell phone number and opening another bottle of wine.

* * *

><p>Jane had spent her time after work preparing simple spaghetti with her Nona's famous secret meatball recipe. Jane was excited for this dinner, Maura had never really tasted her cooking before and she was eager to show off her limited cooking skills to Maura. She had just finished setting the table when she heard her phone ringing.<p>

Jane picked up her phone noticing Maura's number on the front. The detective hoped Maura wasn't calling to cancel their dinner.

"Hello Jane!" Maura Isles said slightly more bubbly than normal.

"Maura… ? What's up? Are you still coming for dinner?" Jane asked walking back over to check the pasta.

Her Nona had taught her that the sure fire way to tell if pasta was done was to throw it against the wall, if it stuck it was done. Jane pulled out a noodle and lopped it at the wall behind her stove. Sure enough, the noodle stuck like glue. She smiled it was done.

"Jaaneeee" Maura whined. "I don't mean to be a bother but can you come pick me up? I am in no condition to drive at the moment."

Jane's face scrunched in concern. Maura never whined. "Sure Maur I'll be right over."

"Thank youuuuuu" Maura said before hanging up the phone.

Jane looked put her phone on the counter. She decided to pack up dinner and bring it to Maura's. Jo Friday would like Maura's yard better tonight anyway.

* * *

><p>Jane loaded dinner and Jo in the car and headed to Maura's. A few minutes later Jane pulled into Maura's driveway. She pulled the large pot of Nona's famous spaghetti and meatballs out of the back seat as Jo bounded out of the car and up to the door barking and yipping happily. She opened the door and walked through the hall placing the pot on the kitchen counter looking for her favorite M.E.<p>

"Maura!" Jane yelled.

"In here!" Maura yelled from the living room.

Jane found Maura on the couch desperately trying to get an open bottle of wine with on the coffee table with her right arm that was too close to her right side.

"Jaaaanneeeee" Maura whined. "Hellpppp me. It's too close and I can't reach it. The human arm is NOT supposed to bend this way." She grumbled.

Jane snickered.

"Um.. Maur.. why don't you reach across with your left hand and get it."

Realization dawned on the doctor and she giggled.

"OHH Yea!" Maura swiftly reached across her body grabbing the bottle with an unsteady hand and poured herself another generous glass.

Jane looked suddenly concerned. "Maura how much have you had to drink?"

Maura paused for a moment in thought. "I believe the saying is it's five o'clock someplace…" Maura said smiling as she downed the glass of wine polishing off the second bottle.

Jane couldn't help but stifle a laugh. "It's five o'clock some_where_ not someplace… way to murder a Jimmy Buffet song, but you were close. However, that still doesn't answer my question. HOW much have you had to drink Maura?"

Maura ticked off on her fingers uncertainly before arriving at an answer.

"This is the third bottle." She said as she popped the cork on another large bottle of wine.

Jane raced over and plucked the bottle from the shorter woman before she had a chance to pour herself another glass.

"Aww Jane gimme back my wine." Maura pouted as she pushed herself off the couch swaying slightly before moving toward the woman who currently had her wine.

"Maura what's with the sudden binge drinking? Do you wanna talk about it Maura? Cuz if you need to talk I'm he-mmph" Jane was cut off by Maura's finger on her lips.

Jane was currently holding the bottle above her head as Maura groped for it.

"You have very soft lips Jane. Very very soft.."Maura muttered leaning against her friend.

Maura leaned in removing her finger from Jane's mouth and replacing it with her lips.

Jane froze at the feeling of Maura's lips upon hers. Maura's moved her lips against Jane's feeling the detective relax slightly she ran her tongue across Jane's lower lip. Jane opened her mouth allowing Maura access.

Tasting the wine on Maura's lips and tongue Jane's brain kicked back into gear and she pulled away suddenly. Maura was drunk, she couldn't take advantage of her best friend like this. With all of her will power Jane took a hold of Maura's arms and pushed the doctor back to arms length.

"Maura what are you doing your drunk?" Jane said attempting to get her drunken friend to look at her.

"Less talking Jane more kissing that was nice." Maura leaned in once again trying to recapture Jane's lips only to have Jane forcefully steer her to the couch and sit her down.

"I'm not letting this happen drunk Maur. I need to sober you up some let me get you some spaghetti to absorb some of that alcohol."

"I am NOT drunnnnkk Jane!" Maura said. She continued to ramble about the rate at which her body would metabolize alcohol as Jane went to the kitchen to fix her a plate, attempting not to think about how amazing Maura's lips had felt against her own.

**TBC…**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- Hey all sorry this took so long and it's kinda short. I'm still working on it I promise and I'm sorry about being so random with updates on my other stories.. my muse is... i don't know stubborn? I guess that's how you could describe her.. or just a bitch and isn't working with me atm... ANYWAY you should all go thank Piazolla Pie who beta'd/ helped out a lot with this chapter ^_^ she's fantastic and I love her to death... also you should all go tell her to write more on Officer Down... and if you haven't read it go read it's AWESOME! Ok sorry shameless pimping over now you are free to read. ^_^**

Maura didn't stay on the couch for long; once she had realized that Jane was not listening to her, she stumbled off toward the kitchen in search of her detective with the very soft lips. She found Jane at the stove, heating up the large pot of spaghetti and meatballs, absently touching her lips.

To the best of her drunken abilities, Maura attempted to sneak up on Jane, which, for an intoxicated woman, was achieved in relative silence. She crept up behind Jane and wrapped her arms around the detective's slim waist, resting her head on the brunette's shoulder. She placed a light kiss on Jane's neck.

Jane shivered, stiffening at the feeling the ME pressed behind her as she turned around in Maura's arms. Maura shot forward unsteadily, her lips crashing against the detective's once again, and it took all of Jane's willpower to pull back from Maura's perfect lips for the second time in one night.

Jane took hold of her arms and pushed her back as gently as possible. Maura pouted.

"Jaaane," Maura whined.

"Maura, you are _drunk_. Now is not the time for any bi-curiosity you might have going on," Jane said as she steered Maura toward the closest kitchen stool and helped her onto the seat.

"But… but I like kissing you," Maura beamed. "Can't we go back to the kissing? _Please?_ It was nice and soft and all this talking is too hard on my itty, bitty brain." Maura demonstrated the small size with her thumb and forefinger, still smiling, before grappling Jane's shoulders, trying to pull the detective's perfect body against her once more. Jane slipped free of the drunken hands with relative ease and walked over to the stove.

Retrieving two dishes out of the cupboard, Jane made her way back to the kitchen island, her hands laden with heavy spaghetti plates for Maura and herself. She set a plate down in front of the doctor, along with her own, and returned to get them both large glasses of water. It was a fact that Maura was to consume no more alcohol tonight.

Jane sat down and removed her shoes while Maura stared at her spaghetti intently, looking as if it were about to speak to her.

"Maur… why are you staring at your spaghetti?" Jane questioned cautiously.

"Because I can't find my fork. I think the spaghetti might have eaten it," Maura replied, completely serious.

Jane tried desperately to contain her laughter. She reached over and plucked the fork that was hidden by the slight shadow of the large spaghetti plate and stuck it in the center of a meatball.

"Don't ya know, Maur? Spaghetti dropped silverware a long time ago. I heard it left a metallic after-taste," Jane said, giggling.

"Oh," Maura shrugged. "That explains a lot." She picked up the fork and took a generous bite of her meatball. Apparently, drunken Maura threw high-class etiquette and manners out the window. "Mmm, my _God_, that meatball is _delicious!_" Maura moaned. Jane gripped her fork tightly and swallowed hard.

"Y-yeah, they're Nona's s-secret r-recipe." Jane shoved some more pasta into her mouth before she said something stupid; she chewed slowly, not being able to take her eyes off her best friend, who, even drunk, could make eating spaghetti and meatballs look like the sexiest thing on earth.

Maura continued slurping spaghetti like a small child, getting sauce on both herself and the table. She giggled.

"You know, spaghetti is fun! It's all squishy and saucy and... _fun._" She giggled again. "Did you know that when we were undercover at Merch, one of the women asked if I was like spaghetti? I didn't get it. She asked me for my number and I told her that I hadn't dated a woman before. She asked if I was like spaghetti, then elaborated: 'straight until I get hot'._" _Maura finished with a grin as Jane choked on her forkful of meatball; she coughed a few times and then took a long sip of water. Clearing her throat, she put down her fork.

"Y'know what? I think I'm done for now. I'll wrap this up and eat it later. What about you? You done, Maur?" She didn't wait for a reply as she picked up the two plates and brought them to the counter to wrap up.

After she had cleaned up all the leftovers and made adequate room in the ME's fridge to accommodate the large portion of Italian food, Jane made her way back to the island, only to find Maura fast asleep with her head resting on her arms. Jane chuckled. She gently picked up her friend – bridal style – and took a moment to adjust; Maura must be more muscled than she thought, because _damn_, this woman was solid to pick up, but Jane managed all the same.

Maura instinctively wrapped her arms around Jane's neck and tucked her head into Jane's shoulder, peacefully; a sigh of contentment escaping her lips. Jane looked at her sweet friend and smiled. Maura was always so cute and perfect. No one else would be able to pull it off so easily.

Jane made her way to Maura's bedroom, setting the ME down on the bed gently, attempting to pull the covers down at the same time; it didn't work completely as planned and Jane ended up half on top of the small, light-haired woman that she was attempting to put to bed.

Maura secured her hold on the detective, pulling Jane completely on top of her. Jane froze, unsure of how to get out of this situation. She tried to pull away but Maura only tightened her grip and rolled the pair onto their sides.

TBC...


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- Okay so I think there will be one more chapter for this. I was planning on making it one big chapter but this was getting a tad long and I felt this was a good place to stop for now. Thanks for sticking with me. Reviews appreciated. **

Maura Isles woke up with her vision blurred. Her left arm was trapped under something, her right was wrapped tightly around a taunt stomach, and her head was resting on a soft chest. The previous evening's activities filtered back in to her foggy hung over brain. The lean body wrapped in Maura's arms moved as Jane became more fully awake. She stretched and rolled over to face the doctor  
>Maura's face held an almost petrified look at facing Jane so early after her behavior the previous evening. Jane smiled softly as she looked at Maura. Jane would never say but early morning, no makeup perfectly natural Maura was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. She gently brushed a hair back from the smaller woman's face.<p>

"Good Morning sleepy head. How did you sleep?" Jane's voice was still deep with sleep.

Maura blinked, trying to gather her thoughts.

"Um.. I slept.. well? I guess. I mean…" She brought her chin to her chest, refusing to let go of Jane just yet. "Ow my head is killing me. I think I need to rehydrate and take an aspirin."

Jane skillfully half rolled away from Maura grabbing a glass of water and a bottle of aspirin off the night stand.

"Here ya go m'lady. I managed to get these the one time you let me out of your vice grip last night."  
>She said with a smirk.<p>

Maura blushed slightly as she took the bottle of aspirin from Jane and skillfully popping to into her mouth before handing back the bottle and taking the glass. Maura refused to extricate her arm from underneath Jane so this was a talented one-handed feat.

Maura bent her body upward attempting to drink without spilling the contents of the glass on herself. She drank most of the water before handing the glass back to Jane who placed it back on the table. Maura returned to her head to Jane's chest, hoping that if she didn't make eye contact maybe Jane wouldn't mention her actions the previous evening.

Jane sighed she knew the large pink dancing elephant in the room couldn't be avoided for long but she wished it would just go back to hiding in the closet for just a bit longer. Alas it did not.

Jane took a deep breath, moving so that she could look Maura in the eyes. Maura kept her eyes trained on the wall behind Jane's head.

"Maura, honey why in the name of sanity would you get so god damn drunk last night. I mean I know you were upset yesterday afternoon but I thought dinner was to make up for that. I mean we've been through some rough patches but you've never tried to knowingly give yourself alcohol poisoning before."

She brushed back a tuft of hair that had fallen in Maura's face. Jane couldn't help the crooked little smile that formed on her face. Even hung over with bed head Maura Isles could not pull off anything less than utterly gorgeous. Maura laid her head back on Jane's chest, tightening her grip on her friend. They sat in silence for a few moments before Maura began absent mindedly drawing random patterns on Jane's stomach over her t-shirt. The brunette couldn't hold back the shivers than ran up her spine or contain the large swarm of butterflies that had suddenly inhabited her abdomen. Jane imagined the goose bumps forming under Maura's touch forming brail only the doctor could read, revealing all of Jane's most well kept secrets. It seemed like forever before Maura spoke.

"I'm not sure if you want to continue this line of questioning Jane. You are all too aware of my inability to lie, stretch the truth, fib or as you call it "sugar coat things" when I speak only the full unedited, unfiltered truth springs forth. I would recommend asking yourself if you are really and truly prepared for whatever answer you might get." Maura's hand was shaking slightly but had not stopped its ministrations.

Jane took the doctors hand in hers, bringing it up to her chest and laying it over her heart.

"Maura Isles I promise whatever you have to say to me, however horrible you think it is, I won't be mad if that's what you are worried about. We will still be friends, you are my best friend and I am not going to let you go that easily."

Maura stroked the skin over Jane's heart with her thumb. She could feel its rate increase slightly. She sighed before rolling over and retrieving Jane's letter from her bedside table drawer. She rolled back toward Jane and laid it on the detectives lap.

"You dropped this in the morgue yesterday when you came down. I waited a few hours before even daring to take a closer look at it. I tried to convince myself that after such a time surely you must have realized it was missing. I honestly did try to respect your privacy Jane.." She swallowed thickly. "But it had my name on it Jane and I'm only human. I mean I know that everyone says that but I really am. I opened it Jane. I read everything you wrote, multiple times actually. It took me a while to wrap my head around it."

Jane's head was spinning, the oxygen in the room was being removed and the butterflies in her stomach were turning to lead. She felt like Maura's words were filling her lungs and killing her from the inside out. Her best friend had tried to drown herself in wine because she couldn't deal with the fact that Jane Rizzoli was a huge lesbian for her. She tried to speak but it felt like there was a large stone wedged in her throat. Her voice was being held hostage somewhere unknown to her.

"At first I didn't know what to feel, there were so many thoughts and feelings. I couldn't sort anything out Jane. It was like I was in a room filled with a million of myself and they were all shouting at me simultaneously. One moment I was wondering how I had missed it for so long and the next I was thinking about you getting angry with the buttons on my blouse when you would be trying to remove it during a heated sexual encounter. I couldn't get any of my thoughts in order. I think that may have been what scared me most Jane. I can list the numbers of pi for pages and talk about theorems and hypothesis for days but the moment you give me feelings, emotions, real people and situations I still shut down. I've been ignoring my own emotions for so long I didn't know how to cope. It wasn't until I read that letter Jane that I realized, somewhere in the back of my mind I've always pictured us growing old together. You and I sitting on a porch swing watching the sunset with grey hair and sensible orthopedic shoes. It just took a little pushing for me to see the rest of the picture, the grandchildren playing in the yard, the rings on our fingers and a million pictures documenting our life together in the background. Jane Rizzoli I love you. I'm IN love with you and I refuse to wait for you to do something else stupid before I let you know. I would have never forgiven you if I got that letter after the fact."

Tears were streaming down Maura's face now. Jane could barely get her voice above a whisper as she extricated herself from the doctor.

"I'm a cop Maura. I do stupid things every day. I can't guarantee you that I'll make it home in one piece every night. 'I can't say I'll be home at 6 for dinner darling'. I can't put you through that. I can never put you through that.

Jane gave Maura one last look before running from the bedroom leaving the doctor with a hurt and confused expression on her face.

TBC...


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N- HEY all. So I tried to make this just one more chapter but I hit what seemed like a natural chapter end before I finished soooo it seems I have at least one more chapter. Yes, I know a lot of you think Jane is an asshole, and yea she is. However, in her mind she is an asshole for a good reason. Anyway yea I hope to have the next chapter up soon. Please leave reviews. It helps to know what you liked, what you didn't, what you'd like to see happen. ALSO if you guys have any prompts or ideas for future stories leave them. I'd love to hear them. OH and finally. I would truly appreciate your help. I am writing... well attempting to write a piece of completely original fiction. I've been working on it for a few years now and I have a character who I still cannot name SO what I would love it if you would do is either PM me or leave in a review or head to my tumblr (Tinyrizzlestimelord) and leave in my ask a name that when you hear it you automatically think "evil bitch" k? THANKS!**

Jane had stormed out of Maura's house, only grabbing her coat as she raced out. She had driven halfway to nowhere before she remembered she had left Jo at Maura's. She would have to get him later. Right now she just needed to be as far away from Maura as possible. She couldn't handle this, any of this. Jane had a plan, it wasn't the best plan but it was solid.

She loved Maura with every fiber of her being. Maura was the first thing on her mind when she awoke in the morning and the last thing that crossed her mind before sleep overtook her at night. The problem was that Maura deserved so much better. Jane was a cop, a broken cop from a blue collar working class family who had more invisible demons and emotional scars than Maura had medical journals. Maura needed stability, and that was not something Jane had. Jane left her apartment everyday knowing there was a good chance that she wouldn't return that night. There were times when she wasn't sure if she'd see lunch never mind the next holiday. No matter how many times she tried to talk herself into it Jane realized Maura could never…. would never be able to handle a life with her. She might think so at the beginning but down the road when Jane had robbed her of the best years of her life then Maura would realize that she had made a mistake, or maybe it would be when Jane ended up on her table in a body bag. No Jane couldn't do that to Maura. Maura could survive a loss of her best friend that would be hard but losing her lover, girlfriend, fiancé, wife? No Maura would never survive that. So Jane did what she always did, she sacrificed her own happiness for that of the person she loved.

Without even realizing it Jane had pulled into the driveway of her mother's small one bedroom apartment. She had driven there on autopilot. She looked in the rearview mirror, her eyes were red and puffy and tears stained her cheeks. The detective wiped her face with the cuff of her of sleeve attempting to make herself look as normal as possible. She exited the car and walked to her mother's door, still not exactly sure why she was here or what she would say. Jane managed to keep the tears in check until Angela had answered the door with a smile, then the dam broke and the tears streamed down her face once again.

Angela immediately took her daughter into her arms, closing the door before leading them both to the couch. She sat them down and pulled Jane close allowing her normally stoic daughter to cry on her shoulder. Angela's surprise evident on her face, Jane hadn't allowed her mother to seen her cry more than twice since she was still in grade school.

"Janie… Janie..." Angela stroked her daughter's hair. "Sweetie, what's wrong?"

"Maura…" Jane whispered.

Angela immediately pulled Jane back to look Jane in the eye.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER JANE CLEMENTINE RIZZOLI?!"

The shock was evident on the detectives face.

"MA?!" She hiccupped. "Why would assume I did anything?"

Angela sighed and pulled Jane back into a comforting hug.

"Janie dear. I love you but sometimes I think you got your brains from your father. If there was something wrong with her you would have said something already. And dear it's evident to seemingly everyone but Maura that you are hopelessly in love with her… Oh no sweetie does she not love you? How can she not love you? She was so obviously in love with you.. I saw it in her eyes but…" Angela rambled.

"MA!" Jane wiped the tears from her face as she attempted to get her mother's attention. "MA! Who said I was gay?!"Her posture was now rigid.

Angela sighed.

"Would you like some tea Janie?" She stood from the couch and walked into the kitchen.

"MA!"

"I think I'm just going to make some tea. Ya know Maura introduced me to some amazing tea."

"MA!"

Angela stopped, she turned and walked back to the couch, she sat down massaging her temples.

"Do you remember when you were seven Janie and I starting allowing you to wear dress pants to church instead of dresses?"

Jane nodded utterly confused on how this was relevant in any way to her current predicament.

"Do you remember _why?" _

Jane shook her head. She just remember her mother being suddenly agreeable with her hatred of dresses.

Angela sighed again wishing she actually had made that cup of tea… or a drink.

"One Sunday we came home from church and I had forgotten to go to the market the previous day so we were out of almost everything I needed for gnocchi. I needed to go to the market so I left you with your father, who of course didn't care what you kids did as long as you weren't killing each other. Well I came home just in time to hear the smoke alarm go off. Apparently you father had nodded off with a beer watching the game and you had put all your dresses in the oven, claiming you wanted them to 'Burn in hell with the sinners.'. That same summer you developed a keen interest in women's gymnastics and figure skating. Not to mention your natural tomboyish nature and that heated kiss you shared with Melody Pond from down the street when you were eleven."

Jane's face went beet red. She didn't remember the trying to burn her dresses but she didn't remember Melody Pond.

"How did y-"

"Janie we did have windows in that shed you know. And I did have a garden right outside that window." Angela chuckled.

"Janie I'm not going to say it was easy or that I didn't hope at times that it was just a phase but I've had a quite a while to come to terms with the fact that you were never going to bring home a nice man. I just hoped you'd bring home a nice woman like Maura. But apparently she can't see what a wonderful amazing woman she is passing on. I thought the woman had more sense than that." Angela's tone turned angry.

"Forget having her over for any more family activities. If she can't see how amazing my Janie is then she can just find some other damn family to-"

"MA!"

Angela stopped mid rant.

Jane's eyes were filled with tears once more.

"She loves me too… but I just… I can't put her through…. I mean I am a cop and what if something happens to-"

Angela started smacking at Jane.

"JANE CLEMENTINE RIZZOLI DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT SENTENCE! MAURA ISLES IS A GROWN WOMAN. IF SHE TOLD YOU SHE LOVED YOU… She did tell you she loved you right?"

Jane nodded.

"good, IF SHE TOLD YOU SHE LOVED YOU THAN SHE MEANT IT. I KNOW MAURA ISLES AND SHE ISN'T ONE TO SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT LIGHTLY. NOW GET YOUR ASS BACK THERE AND TALK TO HER. OUT OUT OUT!" Angela was off the couch and pushing Jane out the door before she could even comprehend what exactly had just happened.

TBC...


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N- Hey all. I think this is the last chapter for this one. I might do a follow up story but I haven't decided for sure yet. I'm not sure if I'm completely happy with this so I might tweek it in the future but I wanted to get it up before I got too annoyed with it and scrapped the chapter completely. As always I appreciate reviews. What you love, what you didn't. I love feed back of any sort. good bad whatever as long as it's constructive. Thanks for sticking by me. **

Maura Isles was pacing around her living room. When Jane had left Maura had initially felt lost, Jane the love of her life and best friend had walked out on her. She had confessed her undying love and Jane had walked out on her like she just insulted the red sox… no it had been worse than that. For the first time ever words had failed her. She could find no words, no comparisons, and no way to express to explain the situation. So she paced, pacing required no thought. It was just instinct at the moment. Her mind raced. After the initial overwhelming sadness passed Maura realized it was her turn to take the reins. Up till now she had let Jane have the control, she had made the decisions. Now it was Maura's turn to be assertive, if there was one thing that Jane had taught her it was that there are things in life worth fighting for and Jane was definitely worth fighting for. Jane was the type of person to fall on her metaphorical sword for any person she cared about and if Maura could help it there was not going to be any sword to impale herself on. Maura heard the front door click and she turned around to face a very scared and lost looking detective. Her hair was an unkempt tangled mess, and her eyes showed obvious signs that Jane had most likely been crying since she left.

Maura crossed the room quickly, stopping only inches from her friend. Jane opened her mouth to speak but managed no words before she felt Maura's hand connect with her face.

"OW! MAURA WHAT THE HE-"

Once again caught off guard the detective was now pinned against the door, soft lips covering her own and arms wrapping around her neck. Jane wasn't sure what exactly was happening but she could not bring herself to fight off the ME's affections again. Her self-control had been depleted the previous night, and Maura was no longer intoxicated.

Maura pulled away, leaving now extremely confused and flustered detective leaning against the door. It was only a moment before her knees gave out and she slid to the floor. Maura returned to pacing the living room, unable to keep still.

"JANE CLEMENTINE RIZZOLI!"

"Seriously what is it with people using my middle name today?!" Jane muttered.

A deadly glare from Maura shut her up immediately.

"I want you to listen to me and I want you to listen well." Maura was pointing at Jane now. Her features a mask of seriousness and her body rigid.

"I don't give a GOOD GOD DAMN if you are a cop or a florist…." Jane's jaw dropped at Maura's use at profanity and a holy name in the same sentence, but said nothing.

"Yes there is no guarantee that when you leave in the morning you'll return, but that is the same chance millions of other people take every day. Granted you have a higher risk than most because of your career path but I understood that and came to accept it a long time ago. What I need more than anything for you to understand Jane is that I love you. This is not just some passing fancy for me. I don't know how long we could have together but one day, just one day where you allow me to love you and you love me in return is worth more than a lifetime with someone else. I'd rather spend every day of the time we both have left together, no matter how long that may be, sixty years or science forbid two weeks. I cannot and refuse to let you run away from this. I am stronger than you give me credit for Jane. You said you can't put me through a relationship with you. Well guess what Jane, too late. I am already in love with you. Please don't let me spend the rest of my life wondering how amazing our time together could have been"

Maura walked over to Jane who was now sitting against the door, her knees to her chest, tears running down her cheeks. Maura crouched down looking into Jane's warm loving brown eyes. She took Jane's hands in hers, subconsciously rubbing the scars there with her thumbs.

"If you don't want me I can understand but unless you can look me in the eye right now and tell me you don't want this then I swear on everything I believe in that I won't let you go Jane. I'm here through good and bad. One good day with you is worth a lifetime of bad. Just knowing I can make you smile, knowing I am the one lucky enough to receive your love, that can get me through anything. Our love can get us through anything. I promise."

Jane was quite for a few moments.

"I'm sorry Maura…"

The doctor looked away. It suddenly felt like she had been stabbed in the chest. She let go of Jane's hands, and started to push herself off the floor. She couldn't let Jane see the pain.

Suddenly Jane caught her wrist, knocking Maura off balance and straight into Jane's lap. Jane's arms wrapped protectively around her.

"I'm sorry I was such an idiot. I know I'm not perfect. I also know that I don't think I will ever figure out why you put up with me, let alone love me. I will never stop thanking the stars every day for it though. You're right. I was being stupid and stubborn and you are a grown woman. I'm sorry it took a trip to my mother's and a lot of smacking for me to figure that out. I can't guarantee this will be easy, but I promise never to give up if you don't. I love you Maura Elizabeth Isles."

The smile on Maura's face could have lite up even the darkest night. She took Jane's face in her hands for another kiss. This one was unhurried and full of love. Maura pulled back and laid her head on Jane's chest.

"I love you too, Jane. Always."

-FIN-


End file.
